Milton Erickson, one of the most celebrated and influential hypnotherapists to have lived, suffered with polio during his teenage years. He was totally immobile for a year.
Here comes the realisation
One day, stuck in his chair inside while the sun shone, Erickson could hear his family having fun in the garden. From his position, he could not see out of the window. He wished that he could. He sat, imagining what they might be doing to provoke the delighted shouts and squeals. After a while, Erickson noticed that his chair was gently rocking, gradually moving him closer to the window. Immediately, he began to will his body to rock the chair more. The rocking stopped. Erickson returned to his reverie, imagining that he was a part of the antics of his family and, unexpectedly, the gentle rocking of the chair resumed. Once more he willed himself to rock the chair more but again the rocking stopped. Erickson realised that it was only when his imagination was fully engaged that the chair would rock and, in that moment, he understood that the imagination is far more powerful than the will.
Erickson’s friend Sidney Rosen reported that Erickson once said to him, “What you don’t realise, Sid, is that most of your life is unconsciously determined.” Rosen took this to mean that his life was predetermined and he did not like that. Erickson clarified: no, just because it is unconsciously determined, that does not mean that it is predetermined because you can change your unconscious.
The influence of the unconscious mind
Our conscious mind is concerned solely with intention and actions. When you recognise something it becomes conscious but, despite conscious intention, there are many things that we struggle to do, or not do. Common examples of things that people have difficulty with include overeating, sticking with an exercise regime, and keeping our smartphone usage within healthy limits. This is because of our unconscious mind and the way that it influences us.
While the conscious mind is concerned with doing things, it has no stored information. If someone tells you their phone number, you may be able to retain it consciously for 10 seconds before it fades. You have to write it down because you won’t remember it. Our unconscious mind, however, has vast quantities of stored information. Throughout our early development, we learned about ourselves and our environment and understood the ‘correct’ way to behave. This was stored unconsciously.
For example, a cat will quite happily stroll into a stranger’s house, sit in the kitchen and wash its bum. If you close your eyes and vividly imagine yourself doing the same, it’s likely that you will experience feelings of nervousness and anxiety. “No!” your unconscious mind is screaming at you, “That is not the right thing to do!”
Our unconscious decisions
Our unconscious represents 90-95% of our behaviour. We may think that most of our behaviour comes from our conscious awareness but, in reality, we drift in and out of consciousness all the time. We don’t realise that we are doing it but most of our decisions are made unconsciously. That is what Erickson meant when he said that your life is unconsciously determined.
Our unconscious mind has a catalogue of experiences which tell, us at any given time: “this is the way we deal with this” – to the extent that you might feel annoyed if someone else’s way of making tea or loading the dishwasher is different from yours (they’re doing it wrong, according to your unconscious mind).
The unconscious mind has no moral overview so both good and bad practices are there, influencing us. The unconscious will go with the method which is most well-rehearsed. This, of course, has huge implications for habit forming, trying to end old habits and start new ones. How we live our lives and what we achieve is, indeed, in the hands of our unconscious.
Changing our unconscious
But, we do have power, and we can change it. After telling Sidney Rosen, that most of his life was unconsciously determined, Milton Erickson went on to say that our unconscious mind is continually changing. If you have a conversation with someone important to you, it alters your unconscious mind. If you watch a film that touches you, it alters your unconscious mind. Your unconscious mind is being altered now by being reading this piece.
The best and most effective way to access your unconscious mind is to be in a very relaxed state. When we work from our deeper unconscious, we are working from our core. Our true abilities, our authenticity, and our real potential are able to come to life – we can do anything we want.
Relax into the flow
Can you remember a time when you were in the zone, in the flow? When we are in a creative space and truly relaxed, whether actively doing something (writing, drawing, building) or just allowing our thoughts to wander, we are in a state of flow. In that state, we can have amazing insights and create wonderful ideas, plans and find solutions. At times in life when we lose that sense of flow, we often try consciously to will ourselves back to it. This is useless. To get back into the flow you must let go, relax, and allow the flow to come to you. Remember Milton Erickson and his rocking chair?
Next time you see your hypnotherapist, or listen to a hypnotherapy recording (like this one) know that you are doing yourself a huge favour. As you relax, allow yourself to let go, let your mind drift and, with curiosity, see what happens. Your subconscious will come to the fore as ideas and solutions start to form. Don’t try to grasp them – they will present themselves to you when you are ready, maybe in the shower or while out on a walk. Your imagination is a powerful tool for change. Relax, and let it do its thing.
Rebecca Bartholomew, 9 February 2022
